May Malen's Diary-Chapter 7

my newest granddaughter at Norfolk

I have no idea why, but Abuelo has loved me ever since I was born. There must be many reasons. One of which is to be the youngest member of the family. On the other hand, he is very tender with my cousins Tomas and Maira Rose, whom arrived to this world well ahead of my time.  Whatever the reason may be, he loves me and adores me, so he says and I can feel it. There is no day with any news from Abuelo. He says he would love to be with me all the time of the world. He says he would like to teach me how to walk properly, as he did with Mum. She was too little and was able to walk grabbed by Abuelo´s hand. He was very tricky: Mum felt Abuelo by her believing that he was supporting her. However, he used to put his large finger on her shoulders for Mum to feel she was secure at his hands. One day, the secret was revealed: as Mum felt Abuelo behind her, she walked fat and pinkie cheeks as she was, when abuelo there appeared in front of her. He had made a curve around her body, a very quiet movement…and there he was in front of her, as she believed he was behind..and then she turned away to know where her Dad was, did nor dismay, turned in front and rushed to Abuelo’s arms and both of them laugh a lot, fell over the tiles of the house in Vilatuxe and Mum started to walk by herself . It was February 1974. Mum was also very tricky. She enjoyed a lot once she felt free and autonomous, to hide her in any little corner of the large house we had in Vilatuxe. To find her out, was a torment: the door opened to the motorway and she might be overrun by a car.

She enjoyed so much to play games with her parents, that she begun to enlarge her corners to hide in the little farm we had surrounding the house. Granny lived in constant fear of a catastrophe might happen. My Mum did not have the capacity of measuring up the danger. She was always so dare; as it seems to me I am as well. I fear nothing as I feel secure with my parents and so many Grannies and Grand Parents as I have. My security comes from them, I feel their presence, with no touch, and I feel happy up to the point to ignore them, abstracted as I was in mu discovery of the world…

Children who are over cared, are never secure oh their lives and always cry, up to the point of making their parents insecure of their own life. They are not aware that such insecurity is transmitted to the child…for the lack of knowledge of awareness on how parents must be: never to punish, to correct with a smile and a kiss, never to push to other children of little age if they do not want to, and leave the child, me in that case, at free, retiring from any place where I use to scrawl, any dangerous object to cut or hurt. Parents may have a “proper” house and elegant furniture many years away! Or so does Abuelo says… and teaches me.